Sunday, December 11, 2011

Who Are You Now?

“There is so much about my fate that I cannot control, but other things do fall under the jurisdiction. I can decide how I spend my time, whom I interact with, whom I share my body and life and money and energy with. I can select what I can read and eat and study. I can choose how I'm going to regard unfortunate circumstances in my life-whether I will see them as curses or opportunities. I can choose my words and the tone of voice in which I speak to others. And most of all, I can choose my thoughts.”
Elizabeth Gilbert

With 2012 just around the corner it is often tempting to take a look back over the past year to see where we have been and use that as fuel to determine where we are going.  I am only recently starting to learn that this line of thinking may not be the best way to move forward into the future.  While it is important for me to know what my family roots are and which life lessons have made the biggest impressions on me to date, I can't use those things to define who I am now.  My past certainly will not be used to paint the picture of what lays ahead for me.
Simply because I won't let it.  The past has zero impact on who I am now because I have made it decidedly so.

"Whatever someone did to you in the past has no power over the present
- Oprah

Someone one in the past may have called you ugly, fat, stupid, opinionated, bitchy, untalented, outspoken or something equally painful.

Someone in the past may have broken your heart, neglected you, smothered you, limited your options or tried to contain your spirit.

Work hard to let those things go.  They happened and may never be forgotten but they are not who you are now.

For a long time, I have lived a life in a way that barely had my feet touching the ground.  I was never really rooted in a moment because there were so many things that I had to do and become before I...

... got married
... had children
... turned (16, 21, 30, 40, 50 or any other milestone age) or
... died (morbid perhaps, but true nonetheless)

I put so much pressure on myself to become what so many people wanted me to be "someday".  I often kept looking over my shoulder, comparing myself against the "old" me.  Any lack of noticeable improvement was viewed by me as a setback.  Thankfully that pressure is slowly but surely starting to alleviate as I move through my epic adventure into finding myself.   One of the greatest lessons that I am deciding to embrace is that the things that happen to me will be based on decisions that I make.  This seems so obvious and yet it has eluded me for many years.  Who knew that accountability is a product of awareness?

20 days are left until the new year.  I couldn't be more excited to move forward.

“You are now at a crossroads. This is your opportunity to make the most important decision you will ever make. Forget your past. Who are you now? Who have you decided you really are now? Don't think about who you have been. Who are you now? Who have you decided to become? Make this decision consciously. Make it carefully. Make it powerfully.” 
- Anthony Robbins

Side Note: Sadly I had to let Project 365 go for now because I didn't want to take something fun and make it feel like work.  I have enough things going on right now and coming up to keep me busy.  I'll take the pictures that come along with the adventure(s) and post them accordingly.

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